Lox and the Latina


I met Isaac from an online ad I had posted. He seemed polite, nice and we shared the same goals. I guess the Jewish guys must like me because this was the third I dated that year.  He picked the Stanton Social, a restaurant I had seen on the food network and was dying to try. I met him up there and we enjoyed our delicious but loud meal. He enjoyed whiskey like I did and didn’t mind the occasional joint.

We moved to Pianos where we drank some more and danced. Well he stood there and I grinded on him. It was almost 2:00 A.M., so he offered me the chance to crash at his place. I would have said no in any other circumstance but he had been a complete gentleman so I said yes. Before we arrived to his “place” he informed that he lived with his folks and being Hasidic bringing a shiksa home was a big no no in more ways than one. He was successful sneaking me in. He gave me a shirt to change in and we slept for a bit. I was on my period so sleeping with him was off the table. I was a pioneer tonight not only was this shiksa sleeping in the same bed as an Orthodox Jewish guy I was also on my period.  We broke two laws no interfaith relationships and “Niddah.”

I heard a knock at the door and it was his mom. She asked “Are you going to work today?” He said “No, mom I’m staying home I’m not feeling well.” We finally got up and he left to get me a toothbrush. I heard the steps and jumped into the closet. I thought to myself “Wow, I can’t believe I have to hide like I’m in high school.” My second thought was “I thought to myself “I’m getting too old for this shit I need to date guys with their own places.” I emerged from the closet thinking I was in the clear but there she was in her Hasidic outfit: black skirt, shirt, hose and wig. She shook her head and muttered “I knew someone else was down here.” She said nothing else as she walked away and headed upstairs. I was glad she didn’t tell me off. Isaac on the other hand got a long lecture from his mother and a phone lecture from his father.

I called out from work and so did he. We resolved that on this beautiful day we would hangout some more instead of going to work. It was nice having a kosher lunch with him. Then we headed to Brighton for fresh fruit and to smoke a J. He dropped me off at the train station and I went home.

The next day I went to the beach with my sister and got super tanned. I love going to the beach with my sister, eating homemade empanadas and drinking nutcrackers both sold on the beach. We usually leave with a nice buzz. He texted me wanting to meet up later and I said ok. My sister went home and I went to met him up. We went for a nice walk and talked about our goals, aspirations and upbringings. It was nice to watch the water and talk to a cute guy. It was getting late so I told him I had to get home. We got in his car and something unexpected happened he tried to grope me, fondle me and kiss me. I was not having it and told him to stop. He immediately stopped and offered to drive me home. We drove in silence to my house. I got out and said goodbye.

The next day I got a text that read “No offense but I can’t see you anymore I am going to Buffalo for law school and I can’t get into anything serious, sorry.” I was taken back was he cutting ties because I had not given in? Or was he afraid of committing to me because his parents wouldn’t approve? I think it was a combination of both. I found it funny that he stated law school as why he couldn’t get serious since law school was three months away and second Buffaloisn’t a bad commute on the Amtrak. He deleted me from Facebook, blocked me on gchat and stopped replying to my texts. A few months later he would try to add me again on Facebook of course I looked at his profile and was satisfied to see he was attending Touro Law. He was not at Buffalo, a second tier school he was Touro, a third tier law school. I am glad that it didn’t pan out since I lwas not going to date a county clerk or legal aid attorney.

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